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Conversation Starters

The real life drama forum. Discuss your relationships or get to know the other members here.
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gmak
Posts: 104
Joined: Mar 30th, '07, 07:04

Conversation Starters

Post by gmak » Aug 9th, '08, 08:43

here is the situation:
you're next to a girl you like and the goal is to start and maintain a conversation.

HELPPPPP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

i need some conversation starters and maintainers.

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Ootori Kyouya
Posts: 17
Joined: May 28th, '08, 19:01

Post by Ootori Kyouya » Aug 10th, '08, 03:23

Very little information given. How can anyone help you with so little detail? Come back when you provide more information because at this rate, everyone just say BS or crap that has been repeated over and over.

fastat3m
Posts: 49
Joined: Mar 7th, '06, 07:16
Location: Los Angeles

Post by fastat3m » Aug 10th, '08, 03:36

You did give little information. But since its around the Olympics, you can ask if she saw the opening ceremony. If she is into design, you can talk about some artistic features of the ceremony. If she into certain events, you can talk about them and then maybe gradually ask about her interests.

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ChiisaiKouma
Posts: 7
Joined: Aug 21st, '08, 15:14
Location: Michigan, USA

Post by ChiisaiKouma » Aug 21st, '08, 18:50

You can always ask about her - where is she from, does she have siblings, what are her interests, favorite ...whatever, etc. But, that said...it's hard to start a conversation if you don't know her...are you strangers, or no? If you already know her then what I said above is ok...if not, to start the conversation it would probably have to be something mutual you are both experiencing (at the grocery store: something about the long line, cheesy mags, etc.).

gmak
Posts: 104
Joined: Mar 30th, '07, 07:04

Post by gmak » Aug 22nd, '08, 07:59

thanks for the input. it really helps.

Youji
Posts: 17
Joined: May 15th, '07, 03:47
Location: Vero Beach Florida,Tokyo Japan ,Toronto, LA

Post by Youji » Aug 22nd, '08, 17:05

Are you talking about the girl you were introduced to in your Prom thread ? or is it some one else
Like maybe a classmate ?

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Ootori Kyouya
Posts: 17
Joined: May 28th, '08, 19:01

Post by Ootori Kyouya » Aug 22nd, '08, 20:20

Such a generic answer...

No different from any other answer you would hear or read from a textbook, counselor or a psychologist.

gmak
Posts: 104
Joined: Mar 30th, '07, 07:04

Post by gmak » Aug 23rd, '08, 06:33

Ootori Kyouya: if you don't have anything better to do than criticize this thread and the people who respond to it, then please don't even bother replying. but i'm sorry that i started the thread with such a vague question. that was my fault. :unsure:

but yes, this thread is in partnership with the prom otoko thread. i need some conversation starters to try to talk to prom chair. we've known each other for about 7 years, but i don't know too many personal things about her. so please, do you have any suggestions?

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Ootori Kyouya
Posts: 17
Joined: May 28th, '08, 19:01

Post by Ootori Kyouya » Aug 23rd, '08, 07:30

Before I reply, let's get something straight here. Don't tell me what I can and can not do. I call it as I see it.

Now, I've done some research on you based on your previous threads which dates back to when you started the whole prom thing.

The answer is simple. The reason why you are feeling the way you are right now is because you are disorganized. You haven't prioritized your feelings.

Granted, you are still in high school. However, I find some of the answers I hear from people to be appalling and boring. The problem starts with you, which can be solved if you take the time to analyze your situation carefully.

This is what I found based on what you wrote...

1. You are swayed too easily - Are you honestly going to pick a girl you barely know for 3 months over a girl you had a crush on and knew for 7 years? Look, I don't know if you talk to a lot of girls or not. Nevertheless, your actions tell me that you'll follow the fiddler if she plays her tunes right. That is very dangerous, especially online. Good thing you have some kind of physical trail to 'Coffee Bean' via family friend. Don't be swayed so easily. Think of all possible scenarios (I said possible...so don't exaggerate or imagine something you would see from a drama).

2. Watch out for pitfalls - If what you said is true about your family friend hinting coffee bean, this sounds more of a step towards an Omiai (I'm sure you know what that means since you know Japanese). Of course, this is just a theory since I am basing it on that sentence.

3. Think of the consequences - If 'prom chair' is popular and she is already has a bf...why would you ask her to the prom? Wouldn't that just make you look like a jerk or a womanizer? The word can spread and you'll end up with nothing. Weigh the consequences for the actions you take. If you think it's worth it, then so be it. Don't expect pity from anyone for regretting the decision you make. You shouldn't even feel regret at all if you sincerely believe how you feel.

4. Verify Verify Verify - Do you actually believe that 'Coffee Bean' sent you the chocolates? Are you sure it wasn't arranged by your family's friend? You have to make sure the relationship is legit. For example, make sure she is not talking to you because she is bored. I don't know what kind of emails or IMs you exchange...but if it emphasizes more on her than you by a wide margin, then something is wrong.

5. Take risks - Risks build confidence. It can fall flat or pay off. It is not a gamble if you genuinely believe how you feel about something or someone. As of now, you're playing it safe. That's not going to get you far...especially in the future. Risks can teach an important lesson by learning from your mistakes.

Lastly, I'll end it with this. PRIORITIZE. Get your priorities straight. Think what is most important to you and others around you. People can give you all the advice in the world and it still won't help if YOU don't prioritize and act on it. Quit making excuses on your mistakes and how you feel like a dameningen. There are people out there who has made even dumber mistakes than you.

Fear (whether its rejection, failing, or anything that scares you) is something that should not paralyze you. It should motivate you to never let it happen to you.

"you only go through high school once, so make some memories" - If you believe that, then you know what to do....give it your all or just give up regretting for the rest of your life.

gmak
Posts: 104
Joined: Mar 30th, '07, 07:04

Post by gmak » Aug 23rd, '08, 08:45

for what i said earlier, i am sorry. it's true. everything you said is true.
i honestly don't know what else to say. you have opened my eyes to a lot of factors that i didn't even think of, and for that, i can do nothing else but thank you.
in regards to your advice, i will definitely put it into consideration and use it wisely.
though i must say that when i first read your post i was a bit surprised that someone would write such a long post, and with such content, but i now realize that it's only because you care; even if it was just a tad bit harsh. =-( but i thank you. i truly thank you.

bomber1122
Posts: 15
Joined: Sep 17th, '06, 10:03

Post by bomber1122 » Jan 13th, '10, 12:31

LOL, its quite simple. just act natural, whatevers on your mind say it, even you think its dumb, bring out that confidence just to say SOMETHING

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