Why Asian Women Don't Date Asian Men

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DMPA
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Post by DMPA » Dec 11th, '07, 00:39

bluespring wrote:^is that how they spell it now? cocasian instead of caucasian?
lmao!!! hahah!! I guess my spelling is awkward. :cry: no need to make fun.

melonyhappy
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Post by melonyhappy » Dec 11th, '07, 00:47

DMPA wrote:I think they do date Asian men, except we don't see it much cuz we're not at the right place at the right time? maybe? I dunno. I personally hate it how Asian women get cocasian men, while us, the cocasia women can't get ANY asian men. It makes me sad, depressed, and low on self esteem. (Well...Actually my self esteem container is always overflowing, but that's ok.) I just wish that the Asian men population took a look around them and saw us; the non Asian women who - I admit- sometimes wish hey WERE asian. T-T Notice me goddamnit! Notice meee!!!! lol! jk, jk. Look away, nothing to see here. lol. But seriously, I think Asian women don't date Asian men just because they don't want to. Ah! But wait!! Although Asian women don't DATE Asian men, they get MARRID to Asian men!! =0 Ta Dah Daaahhmm. Anyways, I really hope I did not offend anyone, and this comment is only my own, selfish thinking. SO if I did offend anyone, I am terribly sorry. So please, Don't tazer me! I DO speak English! (lol...wow...not funny.)
DMPA
:unsure:
hm.. lots of asian guys like Caucasians. (Jin from KAT-TUN, Brian from Fly to the Sky both have stated that Caucasians are their preference)

edit:
actually before i got into asian dramas, my perception are that.. (no offense) asian guys are too feminine/scrawny.... well after being obsessed with asian entertainment... i see Asian guys differently. Whereas i used to laugh at "fob hair" (long hair) now i'm gagahh.. :wub:
It's just culture... I used to watch american tv shows.. and hollywood's idea of "hot' was embedded to me...and there aren't that many asian guys on tv. Then i started watching kdramas... many actors have a nice build...
now i'm into these guys w/ over tweezed eyebrows (KAT-TUN) :wub:
It's just personal preference

and there aren't that many asian guys in my city.... it's probably easier to hookup with a nonasian

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bluespring
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Post by bluespring » Dec 11th, '07, 01:04

^do you live in the mountains or something theres tons of asian in ontario, montreal, toronto

melonyhappy
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Post by melonyhappy » Dec 11th, '07, 01:17

bluespring wrote:^do you live in the mountains or something theres tons of asian in ontario, montreal, toronto
I don't live in those cities...

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bluespring
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Post by bluespring » Dec 11th, '07, 03:33

^that blows at least you know french, right?

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Post by Néa Vanille » Dec 11th, '07, 05:09

melonyhappy wrote:hm.. lots of asian guys like Caucasians. (Jin from KAT-TUN, Brian from Fly to the Sky both have stated that Caucasians are their preference)
OMG! Really? Jin???? :wub: :mrgreen: :wub: I never thought any Asian male stars would actually have a preference for Caucasian girls, much less admit to it in public because the vast majority of their fans are Asian and would probably not like to hear that (and a lot of pop stars just say in interviews whatever the fans want to hear).

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Post by lokelaninyc » Dec 11th, '07, 05:36

Bababooey wrote:
nikochanr3 wrote:i've always wondered (in ny) why more asian men don't date non asian women. unless you are looking to stay exclusive race wise, there are a lot more NON asian men, than asiian men. so once you decide to not be exlucisve to asian guys, it makes sense a lot of asian women have non asian partners. the men don't as much though, which makes it look so strange. i guess the quesion to the asian guys (at least in my area is) what's wrong with non asian girls?
Nothing. I'm sure an asian guy would be willing to date an average looking white girl but somewhere in the back of his head he's probably thinking he could just date an asian if that is the case and still remain in his comfort zone. It's not like they're in short supply here. If the white girl is good looking then he becomes intimidated. Hence that is basically why you never see asian guys with white women, in New York anyway. I'm sure if asians lived in areas where the asian population were low then they'd be forced to date outside of their race.
:thumleft:
agree! i am from nyc and a lot of asian guys are **** around other asians and shy around other races, unless they grew up in a v diverse area. the asians dudes that do date white grls are usually v confident and secure about themselves, but not in an obscene way..
most comfy asian dudes are ones that grew up in say... CT or some other suburb... they didn't have big asian grps they could "stick together" with

melonyhappy
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Post by melonyhappy » Dec 11th, '07, 07:11

Néa Vanille wrote:
melonyhappy wrote:hm.. lots of asian guys like Caucasians. (Jin from KAT-TUN, Brian from Fly to the Sky both have stated that Caucasians are their preference)
OMG! Really? Jin???? :wub: :mrgreen: :wub: I never thought any Asian male stars would actually have a preference for Caucasian girls, much less admit to it in public because the vast majority of their fans are Asian and would probably not like to hear that (and a lot of pop stars just say in interviews whatever the fans want to hear).
true.. well... i have to say that KAT-TUN's a bit of a weird group. they even admit that they fight amongst each other. They are manufactored, but their personalities... seem less "fake" than most? (like they don't hold back regardless if whatever they say makes the group look bad)

About Jin..... He's obsessed with English and French language . this is the guy who ditched his group and went to LA to learn english, right after his group debuted. On a TV interview..he showed a picture of his room, where he had a very skimpy caucasian woman poster on his wall
:lol (man he's such a perv) but I remember fans saying that caucasians are his preference...

>_< oh god i should stop talking about him (too much fangirling :D)

but even my asian guy friends (ok yeah so there are asians here, just not that many).. they don't "prefer" asian females....they like whoever they think are attractive.
^that blows at least you know french, right?
LOL not everyone knows french in canada.. i only know a little (the basics)

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bluespring
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Post by bluespring » Dec 11th, '07, 13:43

lokelaninyc wrote:
Bababooey wrote:
nikochanr3 wrote:i've always wondered (in ny) why more asian men don't date non asian women. unless you are looking to stay exclusive race wise, there are a lot more NON asian men, than asiian men. so once you decide to not be exlucisve to asian guys, it makes sense a lot of asian women have non asian partners. the men don't as much though, which makes it look so strange. i guess the quesion to the asian guys (at least in my area is) what's wrong with non asian girls?
Nothing. I'm sure an asian guy would be willing to date an average looking white girl but somewhere in the back of his head he's probably thinking he could just date an asian if that is the case and still remain in his comfort zone. It's not like they're in short supply here. If the white girl is good looking then he becomes intimidated. Hence that is basically why you never see asian guys with white women, in New York anyway. I'm sure if asians lived in areas where the asian population were low then they'd be forced to date outside of their race.
:thumleft:
agree! i am from nyc and a lot of asian guys are **** around other asians and shy around other races, unless they grew up in a v diverse area. the asians dudes that do date white grls are usually v confident and secure about themselves, but not in an obscene way..
most comfy asian dudes are ones that grew up in say... CT or some other suburb... they didn't have big asian grps they could "stick together" with
i like how you feel lazy and just type v

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Post by SP1CA » Dec 11th, '07, 14:06

melonyhappy wrote:
DMPA wrote:I think they do date Asian men, except we don't see it much cuz we're not at the right place at the right time? maybe? I dunno. I personally hate it how Asian women get cocasian men, while us, the cocasia women can't get ANY asian men. It makes me sad, depressed, and low on self esteem. (Well...Actually my self esteem container is always overflowing, but that's ok.) I just wish that the Asian men population took a look around them and saw us; the non Asian women who - I admit- sometimes wish hey WERE asian. T-T Notice me goddamnit! Notice meee!!!! lol! jk, jk. Look away, nothing to see here. lol. But seriously, I think Asian women don't date Asian men just because they don't want to. Ah! But wait!! Although Asian women don't DATE Asian men, they get MARRID to Asian men!! =0 Ta Dah Daaahhmm. Anyways, I really hope I did not offend anyone, and this comment is only my own, selfish thinking. SO if I did offend anyone, I am terribly sorry. So please, Don't tazer me! I DO speak English! (lol...wow...not funny.)
DMPA
:unsure:
hm.. lots of asian guys like Caucasians. (Jin from KAT-TUN, Brian from Fly to the Sky both have stated that Caucasians are their preference)

edit:
actually before i got into asian dramas, my perception are that.. (no offense) asian guys are too feminine/scrawny.... well after being obsessed with asian entertainment... i see Asian guys differently. Whereas i used to laugh at "fob hair" (long hair) now i'm gagahh.. :wub:
It's just culture... I used to watch american tv shows.. and hollywood's idea of "hot' was embedded to me...and there aren't that many asian guys on tv. Then i started watching kdramas... many actors have a nice build...
now i'm into these guys w/ over tweezed eyebrows (KAT-TUN) :wub:
It's just personal preference

and there aren't that many asian guys in my city.... it's probably easier to hookup with a nonasian
Jin from KAT-TUN??? :wub: :wub: i'm happy :P well, i'm white; other than that my ancestors by my mother's side came from Caucasia :D they were Caucasian Turks (not Russian) , which is known as Cherkes (Circassian) :D

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Post by briancharliee » Jan 7th, '08, 17:43

taiwanesebrothaz rightly said. Though money is still the issue in relationship but not th e culture as I know.

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bluespring
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Post by bluespring » Jun 15th, '08, 16:12

this need revival

Honeylet123
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Post by Honeylet123 » Jun 28th, '08, 05:24

I completely disagree. Asian Women do date Asian men.
There must be something wrong with the women you associate with.
I am Asian, and it doesn't matter what is the Nationality as long as I like the guy.

getawayfrom
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Post by getawayfrom » Jun 28th, '08, 05:47

I can't imagine myself dating any other race beside my own race. It not that I have hatred or that I am a racist, It just that I'm more comfortable within my own nationality. For example, I don't find myself attracted to them. Everyone knows that all races, and sexes are all mixed up and it doesn't really matter as long as you love one another, that's my point.

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bluespring
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Post by bluespring » Jun 28th, '08, 23:03

^you need to explore more

slumbery
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Post by slumbery » Jun 30th, '08, 14:35

asian girl do date asian man .... what makes you think they don't
both my parent is asian .....

aimlesswanderer
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Post by aimlesswanderer » Jul 3rd, '08, 15:38

Well, I have heaps of older cousins, and I had a think about who they've married. And we're Chinese Australian, though nativised. These stats are the cousins from dad's side who are still married.

Of my 4 male cousins who have married, 3 married Chinese/Chinese Australian females, and 1 married an Italian Australian.

Of my 6 female cousins who've gotten hitched, 3 married Asian males (inc 1 half Asian), and 3 married males of European descent.

I know it's only a small sample, but I suspect that it roughly reflects broader societal trends - in Australia at least, Asian females are more likely than Asian males to marry non Asians. So clearly Asian females do date Asian males, but they are more likely to date non Asians than Asian males.

As to why that is the case, I think previous posters have described it well, it's a combination of factors. I would guess that after a few decades things would even out alot.

trimakichan
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Post by trimakichan » Jan 3rd, '09, 22:05

whatever they say, I've dated a lot of different girls (whites, asians etc.) before settling down with my lovely japanese girlfriend (5 years going to 6). I am asian, Vietnamese-American to be correct. It's all about your attitudes, personalities and confidence. I wish good luck to all those asian guys out there, believe in yourselves.

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Post by ManUTD4ever » Jan 13th, '09, 10:56

OMFG i cant believe i spent a whole hour reading this thread when i could have been watching a drama or somthing :scratch: ....... But to be honest reading these opinion's, have really opened my eyes to the whole topic. I live in New Zealand which is a predominantly white country for over half my life and its easy to tell what kind of asians are the " Real Asians" or the " bananas" that is how my asian friends call them and most them are girls.
I go to a private school and that 95% of the Bananas are girls. I strongly belive that Asians living in foreign countries from birth are more likely to become Bananas than ones that have lived in Asia

gurubesar
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Post by gurubesar » Jan 24th, '09, 21:56

12 pages... auuugghh it is too many to ready. So I stard with my own view and share it with all of you who want to read everything.

First of all, the title "Why Asian Woman Don't Date Asian Men" is already very bias. I do not know exactly what is this statement based on. I tried to look at the link on the first posting, but it lead me to a website for dating service. So I can't comment on that either.

Anyway, I do not believe the statement is correct simply for the reason that there are more Asian women marrying Asian men. It is simple fact. Just because a small group of Asian women in the US or in Europe are not marrying Asian men do not justify the statement. In fact when I look around in Toronto, there majority of the marriage are still between people of the same ethnic group. Of course marriage is the last step from dating, but if the end result of dating which is marriage shows same ethnic marriage, then obviously the above statement is not right.

kittykhatz20
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Post by kittykhatz20 » Feb 22nd, '09, 21:48

i don't think that's true.... simply because still majority of the people in our planet marry within their own nationality. There are just few interracial marriages or relationship out there.

so I don't really think that particular statement is true... and vice versa...

and you don't base liking someone just because they're Asian or not... that's just so immature...

DoramaKing
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Post by DoramaKing » Mar 7th, '09, 04:02

Most Asian ppl date Asian ppl and most Asian babies are full blooded Asian....enough said.

Calevera
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Post by Calevera » Mar 10th, '09, 15:53

Hey this might be a good idea for a drama series. A white washed girl one day meets an asian guy who will change her life forever.

What do you all think...?
I'm thinking a romantic comedy!! Who's with me?!

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Post by XrayZ » Mar 10th, '09, 17:17

This thread is funny as hell!

I have nothing to contribute (being of uncertain ethnicity), but reading a scattered sampling of the posts got me thinking...

Lots of posts remind me of when white people say "I'm not being racist, BUT..." I hear that a lot, I live in the ethnic/poor part of town. Most extreme example (heard more than once): "I'm not being racist, but I don't like Pakis."

There wasa thread a while back about how racist J-dramas can be, and lots of people got all offended and were like "No! No! My precious dramas bear no sin!"

One of my closest friends is half-Irish, half-Indian (a lapsed Catholic ninja, to boot), and he sometimes gets on one about how he wants to start a new racist political movement based on the idea of enforced race-mixing.

People are so uptight about their race. I sometimes think it's better to be like me and my mixed up friend, and just be racist against everybody who takes the concept of race seriously. Which, I admit, is like 80% of the world population.

Like another friend says "We're just a bunch of primates anyway."

PS - Calevera, when u write it stick in a tragic subplot about a mixed-race couple where it all goes horribly wrong and they both end up friendless, loveless, penniless, insane and on the brink of suicide!

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Post by sharangeo » Mar 10th, '09, 17:47

that's wrong question makes me stupid to answer

nicha89
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Post by nicha89 » Mar 10th, '09, 18:19

didnt bother to read through the 12 pages.

one reason that i'd like to add here is that asian guys/men tend to view women as inferior to them. i know, not all men are like that, but in general a lot of them are. one issue in my country (THAILAND) is: crap loads of guys really degrade girls who have had sexual intercourse (not before marriage, but before going out with them). they think women withsexual experience are like used products or something. some girls even get dumped after telling their boyfriends that they had sex in their previous relationships. they can't stand the fact that they'r got their girlfriend's "first." I know that not all of them are like that. but i'm pretty sure a majority of them are. dont no about other countries in asia though. but in my country guys seem to think it's totally fine for them to have sex in relationships but unacceptable for girls to do that. I'm asian myself, living in the US right now (and have lived in Europe too). as long as those people still stick to this actiquated view on women, i'd rather not bother myself with them and go with non-asian guys who respect women more. and again I know it depends on the individuals themselvse. it's not about ethnicities but more about cultures/thoughts to me.

huycha04
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Post by huycha04 » Nov 29th, '09, 07:03

Asian girls do date Asian guys
its just that somtime asian guy dont like some asian girls

furansugawakarimasuka
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Post by furansugawakarimasuka » Dec 1st, '09, 09:11

I think the starter of the topic was talking about asian people living in non asian countries.

But still I'm not sure that this statement is correct.

Anyway, I think it is true to say that most of the time, people are attracted by girls or boys of a different ethnic group. I've read that we are genetically programmed to be attracted by people from an ethnic group different from ours, it is supposed to be safer for procreation (in the old times it kept people from having a child in a between blood relationship )

bomber1122
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Post by bomber1122 » Jan 13th, '10, 12:18

LOL, well its not taht asian girls wont date asian men. its because asian men most of them tend to be the 'NICE" guy, BUT not the "GOOD' Guy, asian men are pansys

totemokakkoii
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Post by totemokakkoii » Jan 13th, '10, 12:39

erm.. dunno where u get the impression from.. but where i live, most asians are dating asians..
probably u refering to non-asians countries? if it is non-asian countries.. the reason could be due to the minority %.. cos naturally there will b fewer asians in non-asian countries, so it will not b surprising tat an asian will tend to date non-asian..

xXMzSmilesXx
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Post by xXMzSmilesXx » Jan 13th, '10, 12:45

Will there's nothing that I hate about Asian Guys... and i refuse to date them only because I DON'T FIND THEM ATTRACTIVE. XD

enggrrl
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Post by enggrrl » Feb 20th, '10, 22:40

I lived in Japan, teaching English for a year, and one of my students said the reason she was learning English was so that she could marry a foreigner. I knew another Japanese woman who seemed to only date foreigners. But that's 2 out of hundreds of women I met while in Japan...so I don't know one way or the other, but I think that it might just be that it seems 'exotic'

I'm from Canada, so British, Scottish, Austrailian, Spanish, etc. accents in general are sexy. When I'm travelling people like my 'Canadian' accent. So, I guess it's a case of whatever floats your boat.

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Post by Ethlenn » Feb 20th, '10, 23:02

Oh my, this question is so biased. And written as a statement of an absolute truth that one has to shine a light on and show it to the world. Even if the whole world thinks otherwise (please don't put psychological/anthropological/ ethnic $#$% on me, I overgrew it).
What's the main point? It doesn't concern me if girls from Asia don't date guys from Asia (in foreign countries). Hell, I'm from Europe, and so far I dated only one European guy among all. Is there something wrong? The question can be reversed- why do Caucasian girls want to date Asian men so badly?

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Post by HongKongChick » Mar 17th, '10, 22:01

oh my. .....

why have i never dated an Asian guy? um... let's see. most of my asian guy friends dont find me attractive. why? reasons being 1. i am fat according to their stupid standards, 2. i do not have big huge eyes

so there. enough said.

u know? if asian guys are complaining about us asian girls dont wanna date you, well maybe change ur standards some. not all of us can be a car model or look like a japanese AV girl.

haha... ok, having said that. i must say that it's not that i never liked asian guys, i have, and i had a few asian potentials, but a very very big problem is that i cant stand their english being worse than mine. sorry, if u dont speak english as well as me, there is a problem. this is very very subjective i know, but isnt love subjective?

Fantastical
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Post by Fantastical » Mar 17th, '10, 22:50

ooohhh!!!!! Girls gettin all krazee up in har!!
(munches popcorn)
This is gettin goooooood!

You'll find that in almost every rae there is a degree of someone not wanting to date their own race, ethnicity, etc.


What bugs me are times like "Jungle Fever" and "Yellow Fever"

Not wanting to date a person just because of their race si one thing.
I have a thing for chicks with glasses ( I blame Velma from Scooby-Doo. Chicks that goes jinkies....*purr*.)
So if I was to not go for a chick with glasses it would be just my stupidity. If a woman goes out with me JUST becasue I am darkly packed ( that's black y'all) then hopefully that wasn't the only reason. a reason..sure..I am chocolaty delicious (see picture) but not the only reason.
Attachments
It's true..she does...
It's true..she does...
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Yep....it's me...Damn...if I could clone myself....good times...good times...
Yep....it's me...Damn...if I could clone myself....good times...good times...
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BukHooKee
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Post by BukHooKee » Mar 18th, '10, 02:14

Asian girls do date Asian guys
its just that somtime asian guy dont like some asian girls
I was bored today cause I ran out of drama's to watch so I read through this whole thread and this was the only post that made sense to me.

I'm an asian guy and I have only dated one asian girl and that's all I prefer. What I choose is my choice, I don't need to try the other flavours to know what I like or dislike, I'd rather not be a man whore like deuce bigalo, male jigalo. I grew up in the west by the way, i'm not close minded, and just like the quote states, we asian guys have more choices than a chinese buffet selection. It's not that asian girls don't date asian guys, it's actually the other way around. You "girls" think too highly of yourselves. This myth was started by some pizzed off asian girl who got rejected by an asian guy and wants revenge, haha.

Count the entire population of asians around the world, China alone has 1 billion. We asians are going to rule the world. North America is becoming asian one way or another and all this propaganda about asian guy stereotype is because these people are scared that I'm going to take over the world. Fear me! Oh wait, my moms calling me.

Fantastical
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Post by Fantastical » Mar 18th, '10, 03:49

BukHooKee wrote:
Asian girls do date Asian guys
its just that somtime asian guy dont like some asian girls
Count the entire population of asians around the world, China alone has 1 billion. We asians are going to rule the world. North America is becoming asian one way or another and all this propaganda about asian guy stereotype is because these people are scared that I'm going to take over the world. Fear me! Oh wait, my moms calling me.

:rofl:

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Post by HongKongChick » Mar 19th, '10, 01:32

BukHooKee wrote: You "girls" think too highly of yourselves.
haha... you are right. some asian girls do think too highly of themselves, i'd like to think i am not one of them. :P

i just never met or gone out with any asian guy who took my breath. of all those asian guys that liked me or i gone out on a date with. none showed me anything i cant find elsewhere.

1. money. hell sometimes asian guys like to show off their wealth to impress a girl. i am not a gold digger, i dont require name brand stuff, so it's a turn off for me
2. looks. to be honest, there are a ton of hot asian guys around, just that when they think they are just too damn hot, and that i would fall head over heels for them, turn off
3. cars. yea, that goes hand in hand with the money issue. you all know asian guys like to either drive expensive european cars, or souped up hondas, well news flash, i dont think having ur daddy and mommy buy u a BMW impress me. and driving a souped up Honda with a big ass sticker on the widow that says "honda" or having kick ass rims, or big ass fart can dont impress me. if u got skills, do it right.

that's just a few things i dont like. but then again, there are good asian guys out there, i am just not lucky enough to meet one. :lol

but same goes for asian girls too.

1. looks. she thinks she is so damn beautiful that all guys must love her.
2. money. she requires LV, Gucci bags to be happy
3. cars. she is like a raccoon, she likes shiny things

Fantastical
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Post by Fantastical » Mar 19th, '10, 04:48

HongKongChick wrote:
BukHooKee wrote: You "girls" think too highly of yourselves.
haha... you are right. some asian girls do think too highly of themselves, i'd like to think i am not one of them. :P

i just never met or gone out with any asian guy who took my breath. of all those asian guys that liked me or i gone out on a date with. none showed me anything i cant find elsewhere.

1. money. hell sometimes asian guys like to show off their wealth to impress a girl. i am not a gold digger, i dont require name brand stuff, so it's a turn off for me
2. looks. to be honest, there are a ton of hot asian guys around, just that when they think they are just too damn hot, and that i would fall head over heels for them, turn off
3. cars. yea, that goes hand in hand with the money issue. you all know asian guys like to either drive expensive european cars, or souped up hondas, well news flash, i dont think having ur daddy and mommy buy u a BMW impress me. and driving a souped up Honda with a big ass sticker on the widow that says "honda" or having kick ass rims, or big ass fart can dont impress me. if u got skills, do it right.

that's just a few things i dont like. but then again, there are good asian guys out there, i am just not lucky enough to meet one. :lol

but same goes for asian girls too.

1. looks. she thinks she is so damn beautiful that all guys must love her.
2. money. she requires LV, Gucci bags to be happy
3. cars. she is like a raccoon, she likes shiny things
The same could go with any ethnicity honestly.
both male and female on any wavelength of the Kinsey Scale.

I think the thing people need to seperate the drama on tv from the drama of real life.
yes some sterotypes will come out. In a person but that isn't for everybody.
and we owe each individual to be just that.
an individual.
ANy person that watches a handful of dramas and listen to some music shouldn't consider themselves some sort of anthropologist.
it's rude and it's wrong.
God knows how many women I dated are shocked that I do not like certain hip-hop artist as if I failed their master plan in actual case I actually did.
I like metal, punk, and rock. I also like listening to classical music and some Mingus and Coltraine. SO when someone brings up R Kelly as if they know I like him when I actually hate his oversexualized, devoid of romance music I get furious.
yes .
furious.
We all do that from time to time.
Rice Rocket got name somehow
SO did B.M.W= Black Man's Wagon.
I'm a mini cooper man myself
Like in the original Italian job with Michael Cane.
Last edited by Fantastical on Mar 19th, '10, 17:11, edited 1 time in total.

aimlesswanderer
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Post by aimlesswanderer » Mar 19th, '10, 09:01

HongKongChick wrote:
BukHooKee wrote: You "girls" think too highly of yourselves.
haha... you are right. some asian girls do think too highly of themselves, i'd like to think i am not one of them. :P

i just never met or gone out with any asian guy who took my breath. of all those asian guys that liked me or i gone out on a date with. none showed me anything i cant find elsewhere.

1. money. hell sometimes asian guys like to show off their wealth to impress a girl. i am not a gold digger, i dont require name brand stuff, so it's a turn off for me
2. looks. to be honest, there are a ton of hot asian guys around, just that when they think they are just too damn hot, and that i would fall head over heels for them, turn off
3. cars. yea, that goes hand in hand with the money issue. you all know asian guys like to either drive expensive european cars, or souped up hondas, well news flash, i dont think having ur daddy and mommy buy u a BMW impress me. and driving a souped up Honda with a big ass sticker on the widow that says "honda" or having kick ass rims, or big ass fart can dont impress me. if u got skills, do it right.

that's just a few things i dont like. but then again, there are good asian guys out there, i am just not lucky enough to meet one. :lol

but same goes for asian girls too.

1. looks. she thinks she is so damn beautiful that all guys must love her.
2. money. she requires LV, Gucci bags to be happy
3. cars. she is like a raccoon, she likes shiny things
I think the whole idea of "face" in Asian culture is a big problem (I was raised here in Aust so that means nothing to me), since by that standard you should be buying the flashiest, most expensive things you can get, and show them off to everyone so that they know you are wealthy and therefore "successful". "Success" seems to be highly correlated with wealth, or at least visible, obvious wealth. Hence brand names and flashy cars.

By that standard also, girls should be looking for someone who has lots of nice, flashy expensive things, because he is desirable and "successful". Or at least he seems/looks successful, which is the most important thing...

From what little I know about Hongkers, the people who speak better English are the native speaking expats or the locals who went to school/uni/lived overseas. Or you could always come to Australia (or Canada or the US or the UK). Never mind the dodgy accents.

So you only speak English? If you speak canto or mando then it shouldn't be much of a problem. Though I guess we all have our own quirks and things we can't stand, no matter how illogical!

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Post by Ethlenn » Mar 19th, '10, 13:26

And suddenly we are struck by a lightning in the middle of a sunny day, and all our rational, biased, childish, hidden, bound, twisted habits just disappear in the blink of an eye.

It doesn't matter what kind of partner we are looking for. And so what I don't find supposedly "hot" Latino lovers hot at all? Does that mean I don't date the Caucassian type? We're just beating around the bushes here.

By the by, Fantastical, your post looks like a poem. I told you once, start to write something, and maybe a Nobel Prize in Literature is waiting for ya^^

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Post by Fantastical » Mar 19th, '10, 16:29

Ethlenn wrote:And suddenly we are struck by a lightning in the middle of a sunny day, and all our rational, biased, childish, hidden, bound, twisted habits just disappear in the blink of an eye.

It doesn't matter what kind of partner we are looking for. And so what I don't find supposedly "hot" Latino lovers hot at all? Does that mean I don't date the Caucassian type? We're just beating around the bushes here.

By the by, Fantastical, your post looks like a poem. I told you once, start to write something, and maybe a Nobel Prize in Literature is waiting for ya^^
oohh...bush beating...double entendre ahoy! :P

I wrote something here.
Maybe you should read it and stop using my liver as a garnish!
damm you ya gumiho!
WHY CAN'T I QUIT YOU!*

*quoted from BrokeBack Fox's Den

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Post by Ethlenn » Mar 19th, '10, 16:36

Nice poem, very profound. I see the inspirations in Baudelaire...
The prosody and figures of speech remind me of classical tanka though. My godsss, what a link between East and West^^

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Post by HongKongChick » Mar 19th, '10, 16:59

aimlesswanderer wrote: I think the whole idea of "face" in Asian culture is a big problem (I was raised here in Aust so that means nothing to me), since by that standard you should be buying the flashiest, most expensive things you can get, and show them off to everyone so that they know you are wealthy and therefore "successful". "Success" seems to be highly correlated with wealth, or at least visible, obvious wealth. Hence brand names and flashy cars.

By that standard also, girls should be looking for someone who has lots of nice, flashy expensive things, because he is desirable and "successful". Or at least he seems/looks successful, which is the most important thing...

From what little I know about Hongkers, the people who speak better English are the native speaking expats or the locals who went to school/uni/lived overseas. Or you could always come to Australia (or Canada or the US or the UK). Never mind the dodgy accents.

So you only speak English? If you speak canto or mando then it shouldn't be much of a problem. Though I guess we all have our own quirks and things we can't stand, no matter how illogical!
yup, you got that right. face. oh my oh my... hate it with a passion. i was born and raised in Hong Kong, so i am a native cantonese. but like u said, i was one of those who went overseas for college. my english is even better than my chinese, if u ask me to write an essay in chinese, i will say F*** you. hahaha :P

i just dont like that whole show off deal, so i got the hell out of there. i love hong kong, dont get me wrong, but i cant stand the people. even the ones at my college, most of them act just the same. i never liked to join their little groups.

i have never really dated a chinese/asian guy ever. always been non asian. not intentional hahahaahahahaha :mrgreen:

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Post by HongKongChick » Mar 19th, '10, 17:07

Fantastical wrote:
The same could go with any ethnicity honestly.
both male and female on any wavelength of the Kinsey Scale.

I think the thing people need to seperate the drama on tv from the drama of real life.
yes some sterotypes will come out. In a person but that isn't for everybody.
and we owe each individual to be just that.
an individual.
ANy person that watches a handful of dramas and listen to some music shouldn't consider themselves some sort of anthropologist.
it's rude and it's wrong.
God knows how many women I dated are shocked that I do not like certain hip-hop artist as if I failed their master plan in actual case I actually did.
I like metal, punk, and rock. I also like listening to classical music and some Mingus and Coltraine. SO when someone brings up R Kelly as if they know I like him when I actually hate his oversexualized, devoid of romance music I get furious.
yes .
furious.
We all do that from time to time.
Rie Rocket got name somehow
SO did B.M.W= Black Man's Wagon.
I'm a mini cooper man myself
The original Italian job with Michael Cane.
i hope u are not saying i am one of those people who watched too much drama! given the fact that i was born and raised in an asian city, surrounded by only asians, and only spoke chinese most of my pre-adult life. HEHE

of course no ALL asian guys act the same, same goes for white people, hispanics...etc. but there is a generalization, no matter you like it or not. hell, asians are considered bad drivers, but am i? no. i even drift. but i still laugh when someone makes that comment about me. (jokingly) haha :lol :P

and you know what? i have met one impressive, i think i could marry him, kinda asian guy. just bad timing. so i do know they exist, just that the good ones are already gone... :-(

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Post by Fantastical » Mar 19th, '10, 17:31

HongKongChick wrote:i even drift.


Really?
:wub: :w00t:

No but we all do to some extent try to guesstimate the other person. like playing Marco Polo but given the direction to the wrong pool whilst forgetting your hearing aid.

Hopefully somewhere out there..perhaps in a town or ity nowhere near you some asian guy is thinking the same thing wondering where the hell you are at.

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Post by HongKongChick » Mar 19th, '10, 17:38

Fantastical wrote:
HongKongChick wrote:i even drift.


Really?
:wub: :w00t:

No but we all do to some extent try to guesstimate the other person. like playing Marco Polo but given the direction to the wrong pool whilst forgetting your hearing aid.

Hopefully somewhere out there..perhaps in a town or ity nowhere near you some asian guy is thinking the same thing wondering where the hell you are at.
haha... hearing aid... hahaha...

i guess i have high standards for asian guys. normally, the guys i dated all have an interest in asian cultures, and we can share discussions about cultures, politics, religions...etc, not just the weather. hahaa just that the asian guys that i have met (even my friends) are of the shallow type and dull, and with no real hobby (other than video games and internet porn).

i like to see a guy who is passionate about something, something real. maybe that's why i have always gone out with guys who are into cars, or music, sports...etc

Fantastical
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Post by Fantastical » Mar 19th, '10, 18:04

HongKongChick wrote:
Fantastical wrote:
HongKongChick wrote:i even drift.


Really?
:wub: :w00t:

No but we all do to some extent try to guesstimate the other person. like playing Marco Polo but given the direction to the wrong pool whilst forgetting your hearing aid.

Hopefully somewhere out there..perhaps in a town or ity nowhere near you some asian guy is thinking the same thing wondering where the hell you are at.
haha... hearing aid... hahaha...

i guess i have high standards for asian guys. normally, the guys i dated all have an interest in asian cultures, and we can share discussions about cultures, politics, religions...etc, not just the weather. hahaa just that the asian guys that i have met (even my friends) are of the shallow type and dull, and with no real hobby (other than video games and internet porn).

i like to see a guy who is passionate about something, something real. maybe that's why i have always gone out with guys who are into cars, or music, sports...etc
Internet porn is until you realize you are a voyeur with no danger in being caught.
Unless you watch it at Starbucks.
I stopped playing video games because I have been playing it since the Atari 2600 (just shouting out my age I know) and after awhile you get tired of the same characters in different skins.
Maybe it's just me but hey..I would ratehr just ath the cinema or read a book about the game. and if I am gonna get carpel tunnel I am gonna have more fun getting it the old fashion way before the internet

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Post by HongKongChick » Mar 19th, '10, 18:26

Fantastical wrote:
Internet porn is until you realize you are a voyeur with no danger in being caught.
Unless you watch it at Starbucks.
I stopped playing video games because I have been playing it since the Atari 2600 (just shouting out my age I know) and after awhile you get tired of the same characters in different skins.
Maybe it's just me but hey..I would ratehr just ath the cinema or read a book about the game. and if I am gonna get carpel tunnel I am gonna have more fun getting it the old fashion way before the internet
then again, u are not most guys, u are different. and sadly there are not that many of you around.

and btw, ur age isnt that far from mine :P

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Post by aimlesswanderer » Mar 20th, '10, 12:32

HongKongChick wrote: yup, you got that right. face. oh my oh my... hate it with a passion. i was born and raised in Hong Kong, so i am a native cantonese. but like u said, i was one of those who went overseas for college. my english is even better than my chinese, if u ask me to write an essay in chinese, i will say F*** you. hahaha :P

i just dont like that whole show off deal, so i got the hell out of there. i love hong kong, dont get me wrong, but i cant stand the people. even the ones at my college, most of them act just the same. i never liked to join their little groups.

i have never really dated a chinese/asian guy ever. always been non asian. not intentional hahahaahahahaha :mrgreen:
Yeah, the whole concept of "face" I find to be very shallow and fake and, to be honest, just plain silly. Doesn't matter if you're a terrible person as long as you have lots of bling.

I am really glad that grandpa moved out here, I suspect that if I grew up there I'd turn out even stranger. For all HK's good points, Hongkies seem to be a bit, well, odd - though you seem to be a notable exception. I often wonder how my little brother ended marrying a Hongky girl.

Seriously, it seems like you have a real love/hate relationship with HK. Love the place, hate the people. Pity that you can't really have one without the other.

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Post by HongKongChick » Mar 20th, '10, 16:14

aimlesswanderer wrote:
Yeah, the whole concept of "face" I find to be very shallow and fake and, to be honest, just plain silly. Doesn't matter if you're a terrible person as long as you have lots of bling.

I am really glad that grandpa moved out here, I suspect that if I grew up there I'd turn out even stranger. For all HK's good points, Hongkies seem to be a bit, well, odd - though you seem to be a notable exception. I often wonder how my little brother ended marrying a Hongky girl.

Seriously, it seems like you have a real love/hate relationship with HK. Love the place, hate the people. Pity that you can't really have one without the other.
every now and then, when i go home, i meet with these friends, all they talk about is what u do, how much u make, blah blah... what does ur boyfriend do....blah blah.. well i am sick of that. i vividly remember one time, i went back, and the same day i got off the plane, i went to visit my friends at church. i walked in, all of them turned to look at me. and said "oh..... you are back...... oooohhhh u have gained two sizes" well trust me, i didnt gain two sizes, i barely even gained a pound since they last saw me, but i wore loose clothing, but the point is that i just cant stand it.

if it's not my weight, it's my job, or it's who i am with, or where i go to college... oh and one more time, i was about 20, went with some friends to a party, which was a highschool graduation party.

three guys came over to us, three girls, and wanted to dance. they chattered some and decided this one guy would dance with me, alright, not that i didnt know he really wanted to dance with my friend, but to be "nice" someone has to dance with me. ok so we were on the dance floor, arms outstretched. awkward movements. then some lady with flowers came by and asked my "date" to buy me flowers, he froze, didnt know what to say, so i jumped in "oh my sweetie already bought me some, they are with my coat now" well he was saved, thanked me. and i was in a "i want to kick u in ur balls" mood. worst part was? he asked me where i go to school, i said, i graduated. he asked what i was doing, i said, i was going to college in the US. he asked if i were going to Harvard, Princeton...

i mean wtf? :argue: i honestly wanted to tell him to f*** off, i really should have. i am sorry, when u have experiences like mine, and the ones i mentioned were only the tip of the iceberg, then u will understand why i dont date typical asian men.

they are odd. yes. a college professor once asked the whole class what they love about America. most american students said "freedom" even the international students said "freedom" well when it was my turn? i said "individuality"

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Post by wsim » Mar 20th, '10, 16:59

Randomly browsed the forums.... stumbled across this thread and found it fairly interesting. I am an Asian guy living in Canada but born here. Even still, I have a mix of whitewashed tendencies but more into Asian culture/entertainment (Dramas, movies, music, etc.) as well as hanging out mostly with other asians.

I agree that it seems like money, looks, status and materialism rank fairly high with many Asians when it comes to looking for a potential partner. Which I don't have much of anyways. I find myself attracted only to Asian girls.... I can't really explain why but that is the case.

Still, I never really dated any girl before, so I can't add much to this discussion. This may sound confusing or strange but I've always found myself the "odd one out" as many girls are not interested in me or screen me out since I can't speak or understand any chinese. I have liked plenty of asian girls but most of the ones that I'm attracted to are usually only into typical HK or other Asian guys that fit in many of the stereotypes listed above.

My problem is that I'm stuck in the middle. I get along much better as friends with more non-westernized Asians. There are some girls that consider me attractive but I have a hard time believing or justifying that, due to my non-existent track record of dating and any success with women at all. I'm just a modest, normal Asian guy that has never been given a chance by any girl (Hey... I could be a typecast character in many stereotypical drama storylines/plots, haha)

There are times where I hate how our society works, especially when I work hard, live an honest life, have good qualities/morals, decent range of interests (not video games, anime or "otaku culture") with nothing to show for it. Sorry for this long rant, I'm bored at the moment, lol.

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Post by Cherek » Mar 20th, '10, 17:07

Hearing and knowing the culture differences between east/west I count myself fortunate being born in europe. ppl here look less @ what you have achieved but more wether you can have a good laugh with eachother. Guess that plays a roll in relationships @ the east, where you a looked down on not only you but also you family background

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Post by HongKongChick » Mar 20th, '10, 17:33

wsim wrote:Randomly browsed the forums.... stumbled across this thread and found it fairly interesting. I am an Asian guy living in Canada but born here. Even still, I have a mix of whitewashed tendencies but more into Asian culture/entertainment (Dramas, movies, music, etc.) as well as hanging out mostly with other asians.

I agree that it seems like money, looks, status and materialism rank fairly high with many Asians when it comes to looking for a potential partner. Which I don't have much of anyways. I find myself attracted only to Asian girls.... I can't really explain why but that is the case.

Still, I never really dated any girl before, so I can't add much to this discussion. This may sound confusing or strange but I've always found myself the "odd one out" as many girls are not interested in me or screen me out since I can't speak or understand any chinese. I have liked plenty of asian girls but most of the ones that I'm attracted to are usually only into typical HK or other Asian guys that fit in many of the stereotypes listed above.

My problem is that I'm stuck in the middle. I get along much better as friends with more non-westernized Asians. There are some girls that consider me attractive but I have a hard time believing or justifying that, due to my non-existent track record of dating and any success with women at all. I'm just a modest, normal Asian guy that has never been given a chance by any girl (Hey... I could be a typecast character in many stereotypical drama storylines/plots, haha)

There are times where I hate how our society works, especially when I work hard, live an honest life, have good qualities/morals, decent range of interests (not video games, anime or "otaku culture") with nothing to show for it. Sorry for this long rant, I'm bored at the moment, lol.
oh sweetie, i totally understand where u are coming from. though i am not a guy, but i have friends that are just like u. nice, honest, decent guys who finish last. but i always said that the nice guys do end up with nice girls because after all those fake beauties are taken by those bling bling asian guys, u are left with the good ones. u dont want to date those loser, poser asian girls anyways. :-)

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Post by HongKongChick » Mar 20th, '10, 17:36

Cherek wrote:Hearing and knowing the culture differences between east/west I count myself fortunate being born in europe. ppl here look less @ what you have achieved but more wether you can have a good laugh with eachother. Guess that plays a roll in relationships @ the east, where you a looked down on not only you but also you family background
yup yup yup. just like in alot of korean dramas, if a woman was divorced with kids, she is gonna have a very hard time finding someone who will accept her, or find a family that will accept a "second hand" woman. it's sad, but true

and the whole, if u are wealthy, u better marry a equally wealthy person, or else, ur family or family friends will freak out.

maybe that's why asian dramas always have that plot where rich boy falls in love with poor girl. :-)

i am glad i was born and raised in hong kong, but educated in the states. :thumright:

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Post by wsim » Mar 21st, '10, 18:58

HongKongChick wrote:
oh sweetie, i totally understand where u are coming from. though i am not a guy, but i have friends that are just like u. nice, honest, decent guys who finish last. but i always said that the nice guys do end up with nice girls because after all those fake beauties are taken by those bling bling asian guys, u are left with the good ones. u dont want to date those loser, poser asian girls anyways. :-)
Thanks for the kind words.

Good to know that I'm not the only one out there. Often, it really seems that way as almost everyone that I know have had relationships before or currently.

I just have to keep my head up and moving forward.

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Post by Fantastical » Mar 22nd, '10, 02:30

wsim wrote:
HongKongChick wrote:
oh sweetie, i totally understand where u are coming from. though i am not a guy, but i have friends that are just like u. nice, honest, decent guys who finish last. but i always said that the nice guys do end up with nice girls because after all those fake beauties are taken by those bling bling asian guys, u are left with the good ones. u dont want to date those loser, poser asian girls anyways. :-)
Thanks for the kind words.

Good to know that I'm not the only one out there. Often, it really seems that way as almost everyone that I know have had relationships before or currently.

I just have to keep my head up and moving forward.
Yeah you aren't the only one.
I think each social group has members that don't fit the default guide line
One thing that always struck me as messed up in movies is the vanishing Asian man.
It goes like this.
In a movie especially an action movie the default character white guy usually kisses the girl.
Black guy oh yeah...he doesn't even have to be the lead character but he is oversexualized.
But the asian guy...MAYBE a handshake then he disappears into the wind.
pretty much every american jackie chan flick, In the movie The One with Jet Li he didn't even kiss his own wife. Ninja Assassin......disappeared into the wind...
Yeah the media pretty much makes asian men into neutered. Except for Harold and Kumar movies.
Awesome.

Oh..this is for you buddy

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Post by HongKongChick » Mar 22nd, '10, 16:39

Fantastical wrote: It goes like this.
In a movie especially an action movie the default character white guy usually kisses the girl.
Black guy oh yeah...he doesn't even have to be the lead character but he is oversexualized.
But the asian guy...MAYBE a handshake then he disappears into the wind.
pretty much every american jackie chan flick, In the movie The One with Jet Li he didn't even kiss his own wife. Ninja Assassin......disappeared into the wind...
Yeah the media pretty much makes asian men into neutered. Except for Harold and Kumar movies.
Awesome.
hell, it;s like this

white guy, always the lead character, gets the girl, beats up bad guys
Black guy, yea, total red shirt
Mexican guy, always the gangster, or in prison, gets killed
Asian guy, background.

but here are SOOOOO many awesome (i meant HOT) asian actors out there that can also kiss the girl... ah....

Fantastical
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Post by Fantastical » Mar 22nd, '10, 19:35

HongKongChick wrote:
Fantastical wrote: It goes like this.
In a movie especially an action movie the default character white guy usually kisses the girl.
Black guy oh yeah...he doesn't even have to be the lead character but he is oversexualized.
But the asian guy...MAYBE a handshake then he disappears into the wind.
pretty much every american jackie chan flick, In the movie The One with Jet Li he didn't even kiss his own wife. Ninja Assassin......disappeared into the wind...
Yeah the media pretty much makes asian men into neutered. Except for Harold and Kumar movies.
Awesome.
hell, it;s like this

white guy, always the lead character, gets the girl, beats up bad guys
Black guy, yea, total red shirt
Mexican guy, always the gangster, or in prison, gets killed
Asian guy, background.

but here are SOOOOO many awesome (i meant HOT) asian actors out there that can also kiss the girl... ah....
unless the mexican guy is a teacher or commander of a starship escaping cylons
asian guy is either the martial arts guy
the doctor
tech guy
or terrorist

But would just like to know what jackhole though that being asian would be a good idea of a costume to sell at halloween?

noobee
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Post by noobee » Mar 22nd, '10, 19:52

i dont understand the title...

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Location: Hong Kong

Post by HongKongChick » Mar 22nd, '10, 20:39

Fantastical wrote:
unless the mexican guy is a teacher or commander of a starship escaping cylons
asian guy is either the martial arts guy
the doctor
tech guy
or terrorist

But would just like to know what jackhole though that being asian would be a good idea of a costume to sell at halloween?
mexican as a teacher...um... rare

commander of a starship escaping cylons.... WHAHAHHAHA :lol

heck, affirmative action doesnt just include black people anymore. maybe one day we will have an Oscar winning asian actor/actress. :idea:

if i dont have a costume for halloween, i can just wear my normal clothes and go as an asian girl! yay!! :cheers:

Fantastical
Posts: 325
Joined: Sep 5th, '09, 19:58
Location: USA

Post by Fantastical » Mar 22nd, '10, 20:58

HongKongChick wrote:
Fantastical wrote:
unless the mexican guy is a teacher or commander of a starship escaping cylons
asian guy is either the martial arts guy
the doctor
tech guy
or terrorist

But would just like to know what jackhole though that being asian would be a good idea of a costume to sell at halloween?
mexican as a teacher...um... rare

commander of a starship escaping cylons.... WHAHAHHAHA :lol

heck, affirmative action doesnt just include black people anymore. maybe one day we will have an Oscar winning asian actor/actress. :idea:

if i dont have a costume for halloween, i can just wear my normal clothes and go as an asian girl! yay!! :cheers:
the first steo..it is gonna sound crude but...hetero asian male porn star.
seriously.
the asian male has to be seen in a more predatory light in romantic situations
it tarts with porn...seriously

HongKongChick
Posts: 226
Joined: Mar 17th, '10, 20:12
Location: Hong Kong

Post by HongKongChick » Mar 22nd, '10, 21:03

Fantastical wrote:
HongKongChick wrote:
Fantastical wrote:
unless the mexican guy is a teacher or commander of a starship escaping cylons
asian guy is either the martial arts guy
the doctor
tech guy
or terrorist

But would just like to know what jackhole though that being asian would be a good idea of a costume to sell at halloween?
mexican as a teacher...um... rare

commander of a starship escaping cylons.... WHAHAHHAHA :lol

heck, affirmative action doesnt just include black people anymore. maybe one day we will have an Oscar winning asian actor/actress. :idea:

if i dont have a costume for halloween, i can just wear my normal clothes and go as an asian girl! yay!! :cheers:
the first steo..it is gonna sound crude but...hetero asian male porn star.
seriously.
the asian male has to be seen in a more predatory light in romantic situations
it tarts with porn...seriously
OK.... um.... i prefer not seeing them in porn! AHAHAHAHAHAH :lol

Fantastical
Posts: 325
Joined: Sep 5th, '09, 19:58
Location: USA

Post by Fantastical » Mar 22nd, '10, 22:35

HongKongChick wrote:
Fantastical wrote:
HongKongChick wrote:
mexican as a teacher...um... rare

commander of a starship escaping cylons.... WHAHAHHAHA :lol

heck, affirmative action doesnt just include black people anymore. maybe one day we will have an Oscar winning asian actor/actress. :idea:

if i dont have a costume for halloween, i can just wear my normal clothes and go as an asian girl! yay!! :cheers:
the first steo..it is gonna sound crude but...hetero asian male porn star.
seriously.
the asian male has to be seen in a more predatory light in romantic situations
it tarts with porn...seriously
OK.... um.... i prefer not seeing them in porn! AHAHAHAHAHAH :lol
Bu tthe thing is this. Leadng men have ot be sexy right? right
but th biggest stereotype for asian men is that they all have small penises.
Show the reason why the population is so high in china and why so many asian men or named Wang, Dong, and Long.
After that it's a step up to some sort of movie that the academy will eat up.

An asian character has to suffer some how or be a big stereotpe. Look at the psat academy award nominees of color. in some way they have to be a sereotypical this or that

aimlesswanderer
Posts: 165
Joined: Feb 4th, '07, 03:53
Location: Sydney, Australia

Post by aimlesswanderer » Mar 24th, '10, 03:43

HongKongChick wrote: every now and then, when i go home, i meet with these friends, all they talk about is what u do, how much u make, blah blah... what does ur boyfriend do....blah blah.. well i am sick of that. i vividly remember one time, i went back, and the same day i got off the plane, i went to visit my friends at church. i walked in, all of them turned to look at me. and said "oh..... you are back...... oooohhhh u have gained two sizes" well trust me, i didnt gain two sizes, i barely even gained a pound since they last saw me, but i wore loose clothing, but the point is that i just cant stand it.

if it's not my weight, it's my job, or it's who i am with, or where i go to college... oh and one more time, i was about 20, went with some friends to a party, which was a highschool graduation party.

three guys came over to us, three girls, and wanted to dance. they chattered some and decided this one guy would dance with me, alright, not that i didnt know he really wanted to dance with my friend, but to be "nice" someone has to dance with me. ok so we were on the dance floor, arms outstretched. awkward movements. then some lady with flowers came by and asked my "date" to buy me flowers, he froze, didnt know what to say, so i jumped in "oh my sweetie already bought me some, they are with my coat now" well he was saved, thanked me. and i was in a "i want to kick u in ur balls" mood. worst part was? he asked me where i go to school, i said, i graduated. he asked what i was doing, i said, i was going to college in the US. he asked if i were going to Harvard, Princeton...

i mean wtf? :argue: i honestly wanted to tell him to f*** off, i really should have. i am sorry, when u have experiences like mine, and the ones i mentioned were only the tip of the iceberg, then u will understand why i dont date typical asian men.

they are odd. yes. a college professor once asked the whole class what they love about America. most american students said "freedom" even the international students said "freedom" well when it was my turn? i said "individuality"
Yeah, Hongkies are generally a bit strange. A nice place to visit though. No wonder you escaped!

HongKongChick
Posts: 226
Joined: Mar 17th, '10, 20:12
Location: Hong Kong

Post by HongKongChick » Mar 24th, '10, 04:01

aimlesswanderer wrote:
Yeah, Hongkies are generally a bit strange. A nice place to visit though. No wonder you escaped!
damn straight i did. i do have good friends there, but really, generally, i dont get along with hongkies.

they are a bunch of copycats stuck between chinese and japanese. no individual style, just copy...

Fantastical
Posts: 325
Joined: Sep 5th, '09, 19:58
Location: USA

Post by Fantastical » Mar 24th, '10, 04:48

HongKongChick wrote:
aimlesswanderer wrote:
Yeah, Hongkies are generally a bit strange. A nice place to visit though. No wonder you escaped!
damn straight i did. i do have good friends there, but really, generally, i dont get along with hongkies.

they are a bunch of copycats stuck between chinese and japanese. no individual style, just copy...
Hongkies?
OMG I am gonna put that in one of my stories!

whowhatme
Posts: 35
Joined: Nov 16th, '05, 10:14
Location: Muscle Shoals, AL, USA

Post by whowhatme » Mar 24th, '10, 06:41

i dunno, in my experience it's not really about the ethnicity.. as an asian guy, i've dated both asians (chinese and japanese) and non-asians (all white :-(). it's not that hard to get a girlfriend, just put yourself out there! in the area where i'm at, there's not many asian girls, but that's OK!

As long as you're yourself you can find a good girl/boyfriend. I don't really think it has to do with what race you are, just your personality. I know a lot of outgoing asian guys who get lots of girls, and a lot of nerdy asian guys that might fit the asian stereotype to a T. Anyway, I don't really have a preference for asian girls or non-asian girls, but I would want a girlfriend who likes me for my personality, not for my race. :wub:

And hopefully asian girls are the same way. I get really turned off when an asian girl ONLY hangs out with white ppl and ignores you just on the basis of being asian. i think if you don't even give asian dudes a chance that isn't very fair :x

Cherek
Posts: 33
Joined: Mar 31st, '09, 00:08
Location: Europe

Post by Cherek » Mar 24th, '10, 10:03

whowhatme wrote:I get really turned off when an asian girl ONLY hangs out with white ppl and ignores you just on the basis of being asian. i think if you don't even give asian dudes a chance that isn't very fair :x
....because she can not have a personal preference? I think that if some1 doesn't want to date a specific race it should be respected.

Fantastical
Posts: 325
Joined: Sep 5th, '09, 19:58
Location: USA

Post by Fantastical » Mar 24th, '10, 13:21

Cherek wrote:
whowhatme wrote:I get really turned off when an asian girl ONLY hangs out with white ppl and ignores you just on the basis of being asian. i think if you don't even give asian dudes a chance that isn't very fair :x
....because she can not have a personal preference? I think that if some1 doesn't want to date a specific race it should be respected.
Dating is one thing. I can get that. But not wanting to hang around with others of your race...inda weird.. ONLY white people...that does get to me. I can understand if the neighborhood has like 3 people of color. One is your brother an dthe other is a douche bag. I get that. But like if there are other races. Hispanic, black, and other and you only ONLY want to be around white people? Like whoa? Do you believe what you see in movies? Are all black people rapper and gangsters? are all Hispanics dish washers and cocaine dealers?


Diversify that cultural portfolio. The social default ain't best Just default.

YOu know what...I am setting up an Ask A Black Guy up in this.
Yes...on an Asian Drama forum of all places.

PocketKiriyama
Posts: 272
Joined: Aug 7th, '06, 03:24
Location: Some where in Illinois, USA

Post by PocketKiriyama » Mar 24th, '10, 15:31

Fantastical wrote:
Cherek wrote:
whowhatme wrote:I get really turned off when an asian girl ONLY hangs out with white ppl and ignores you just on the basis of being asian. i think if you don't even give asian dudes a chance that isn't very fair :x
....because she can not have a personal preference? I think that if some1 doesn't want to date a specific race it should be respected.
Dating is one thing. I can get that. But not wanting to hang around with others of your race...inda weird.. ONLY white people...that does get to me. I can understand if the neighborhood has like 3 people of color. One is your brother an the other is a douche bag. I get that. But like if there are other races. Hispanic, black, and other and you only ONLY want to be around white people? Like whoa? Do you believe what you see in movies? Are all black people rapper and gangsters? are all Hispanics dish washers and cocaine dealers?


Diversify that cultural portfolio. The social default ain't best Just default.

YOu know what...I am setting up an Ask A Black Guy up in this.
Yes...on an Asian Drama forum of all places.
LOL "Ask A Black Guy" like in the chappelle show!
Dude you are one awesome black dude.
I've known a lot of people from all ethnic backgrounds and I'll put you on my coolest dudes list.

HongKongChick I seriously don't get it. You said those asian guys don't date you just because they think you're kinda of chunky? WTF?! Who care's if you got a little meat on you. If that is you on your avatar, you're kind of cute. This coming from an Asian guy. If it was me I'd say "If I date her, I'll slim her down to my size". Not that a little meat is bad but health is the best wealth.

I've seen plenty times where instance of racial stereotypes were played out right before my eyes or even times when some Asian girls would reject and ignored my Asian friends in disgust...yes they didn't reject them in a normal sense which is fine because rejection is a normal process in dating but giving that look of like you've seen a pile a manure is pretty bad. Now they proceeded to hit on a few white guys who oddly enough was not as good looking as my friends. That hit me there. Nope they weren't acquaintance either because I can here their conversation. It was their first time seeing each other.

But likewise I myself would put dating a black chick or a blond chick at the bottom of this list of girls to date. Don't get me wrong I do have friends from both ethnic groups it's just that they don't have the same interest as I do and we might not click as well as girls from the Asian side.

I've dated before but never had a girlfriend as I never seem to want to get into a real relationship or there have never been one that would makes my heart skip a beat. There was a time but I screwed up on that one.

Maybe it is stereotypical but I love to drive fast and because of that I got into modifying cars. I don't like the word "souped up" as its a very ignorant phrase.
HongKongChick here it goes! I do own a Honda Civic. In fact I just bought one after selling my Toyota MR2 recently. Other than the obnoxiously loud exhaust I do love that car. I also own a Supra. Both cars are modified beyond belief. And I'm not a crappy driver either. I've had no moving violation or accident in over 8 years. Other than that I do practice kickboxing, boxing and kendo. I learned kickboxing from my dad because he used to be one professionally but I learn kendo on my own from videos. Thank you youtube! I just got on playing on the guitar recently but stopped as the strings went crap on me. I just got some new strings recently but never had the time to put it. Other than that I do the usual thing watching Asian dramas, animes, read mangas/manhwa/manhua, and listens to a lot of music on my spare time.
But I still wonder how I'm able to do all these hobbies even though I work 50-60 hours a week? Am I a workaholic? Nope I never liked doing overtimes. But there are a lot of things that I want and I've always gets things with my own efforts. When a guy pulls next to me with his new Lan-Evo or STI trying to race me. It pisses me off because I know there's no way this kid can afford it.

I listed all this just so I can ask HongKongChick.
So far do I fit in the normal Asian guys that you've seen? Or am I out of the norm?

I have to agree that Asian families usually do look at a person's background when considering marriage or just even dating.
My father was rich, but got poor because of war. Married my mom then came to the US after having me and my two other siblings. We were dirt poor affording only to live in basements, then moved to a trailer, and now we own our own house and very well off. Even in today's manure economy.
So just because a guy's poor now doesn't mean he will remain that way in the future and likewise a rich or well off family can turn poor as I have already experienced both through my father's eyes.

That was a long rant..........

HongKongChick
Posts: 226
Joined: Mar 17th, '10, 20:12
Location: Hong Kong

Post by HongKongChick » Mar 24th, '10, 16:19

whowhatme wrote: I get really turned off when an asian girl ONLY hangs out with white ppl and ignores you just on the basis of being asian. i think if you don't even give asian dudes a chance that isn't very fair :x
i agree! honestly i get annoyed too when asian girls ONLY hang out with white guys, and i really meant just white guys, coz really, how often do you see asian girls hanging out with bunch of black or hispanic guys? no much.

those girls are living in a movie. not all white guys are brad pitt. but then again, if u actually know me, u will see that i do hang out with a bunch of white dudes, and maybe one or two asian girls and one or two asian guys and sometimes one or two black dudes.. not that i dont have friends in other races, just that my circle is mostly white guys. my asian friends here are not in the same circle, plus, i dont have many asian friends here in the states. is it my choice not to have asian friends? partly. when i was in college, i had asian friends, a couple of hongkies, some japanese and vietnamese. but i chose not to join the hongkies' group coz i didnt like them, they gossiped too much. some of them walked up to me and told me they know me. uh.... what? we never met, so obviously their little circle talked about me. but tat's alright. my english is 100 times better than theirs because i didnt JUST hang out with my own kind.
Last edited by HongKongChick on Mar 24th, '10, 16:43, edited 1 time in total.

HongKongChick
Posts: 226
Joined: Mar 17th, '10, 20:12
Location: Hong Kong

Post by HongKongChick » Mar 24th, '10, 16:42

PocketKiriyama wrote:
HongKongChick I seriously don't get it. You said those asian guys don't date you just because they think you're kinda of chunky? WTF?! Who care's if you got a little meat on you. If that is you on your avatar, you're kind of cute. This coming from an Asian guy. If it was me I'd say "If I date her, I'll slim her down to my size". Not that a little meat is bad but health is the best wealth.
see? u said "if i date her, i'll slim her down to my size" shouldn't u like someone for who they are, instead of changing their looks? now, what is ur size? i am 5 foot 3, 120 pounds. well within my BMI standard, but of course with Asian guys being skinny (most of them), i am considered fat. i used to be a swimmer, the compete kind, for that matter, so i have broader shoulders than most asian girls. asian guys seem to think i am "butch" because i work out... :cry:

PocketKiriyama wrote:I've seen plenty times where instance of racial stereotypes were played out right before my eyes or even times when some Asian girls would reject and ignored my Asian friends in disgust...yes they didn't reject them in a normal sense which is fine because rejection is a normal process in dating but giving that look of like you've seen a pile a manure is pretty bad. Now they proceeded to hit on a few white guys who oddly enough was not as good looking as my friends. That hit me there. Nope they weren't acquaintance either because I can here their conversation. It was their first time seeing each other.
that's BS. i hate those girls. if i reject, i reject nicely. :) and i will for sure take some good looking asian dudes!!!!!!!!! :wub: heck at least we will both like asian food, and i dont have to force them to eat what i cook. hahha


PocketKiriyama wrote:Maybe it is stereotypical but I love to drive fast and because of that I got into modifying cars. I don't like the word "souped up" as its a very ignorant phrase.
HongKongChick here it goes! I do own a Honda Civic. In fact I just bought one after selling my Toyota MR2 recently. Other than the obnoxiously loud exhaust I do love that car. I also own a Supra. Both cars are modified beyond belief. And I'm not a crappy driver either. I've had no moving violation or accident in over 8 years. Other than that I do practice kickboxing, boxing and kendo. I learned kickboxing from my dad because he used to be one professionally but I learn kendo on my own from videos. Thank you youtube! I just got on playing on the guitar recently but stopped as the strings went crap on me. I just got some new strings recently but never had the time to put it. Other than that I do the usual thing watching Asian dramas, animes, read mangas/manhwa/manhua, and listens to a lot of music on my spare time.
But I still wonder how I'm able to do all these hobbies even though I work 50-60 hours a week? Am I a workaholic? Nope I never liked doing overtimes. But there are a lot of things that I want and I've always gets things with my own efforts. When a guy pulls next to me with his new Lan-Evo or STI trying to race me. It pisses me off because I know there's no way this kid can afford it.

I listed all this just so I can ask HongKongChick.
So far do I fit in the normal Asian guys that you've seen? Or am I out of the norm?
first of all, dont get all offended when i said "souped up". this term for me is when a car was only modified with a fart can, which makes ur car sound like ass, plus, it's all noise and no speed. a turn off for me. if u want the sound effect, get the whole thing done, sounds way better. or the car has those lights under the car, or big loud speakers, subs, or big shiny rims, all cosmetic, not real power

second, it's not stereotypical to like to drive fast. i like to drive fast myself

third, there is nothing wrong with having a honda civic, i used to have a 2000 honda civic si, got freaking stolen.... :( but it was alll stock!

forth. learning kickboxing, boxing, kendo... not typical. most asian guys dont even work out. hahaha

to me, u are not the stereotypical asian guy. now i dont know you know you, so i cant say if ur personality is stereotypical or not. but as far as i see, you have hobbies, that's way better alot of other guys out there.

and like i said before, i hate when those guys try to impress me with their expensive, mommy and daddy bought for me, cars... hate it. even in my car circle, we dont like them. there was a good looking, rich white boy who was in my class, who had a STi, all modded. and he liked me alot. but ya.... no thank you. yea, he is cute and rich, which if i were a typical asian girl, i would have jumped him. but it was a turn off for me.
PocketKiriyama wrote:I have to agree that Asian families usually do look at a person's background when considering marriage or just even dating.
My father was rich, but got poor because of war. Married my mom then came to the US after having me and my two other siblings. We were dirt poor affording only to live in basements, then moved to a trailer, and now we own our own house and very well off. Even in today's manure economy.
So just because a guy's poor now doesn't mean he will remain that way in the future and likewise a rich or well off family can turn poor as I have already experienced both through my father's eyes.

That was a long rant..........


for me, i couldnt care less what his family thinks. and my family is not that typical kind, they dont care if i date a poor lad or not. all they care about is that he is a good guy, loves me, and has drive. nothing is worst than a guy who doenst know what he is doing, and does nothing to achieve his goal.

PocketKiriyama
Posts: 272
Joined: Aug 7th, '06, 03:24
Location: Some where in Illinois, USA

Post by PocketKiriyama » Mar 24th, '10, 18:15

HongKongChick wrote: see? u said "if i date her, i'll slim her down to my size" shouldn't u like someone for who they are, instead of changing their looks? now, what is ur size? i am 5 foot 3, 120 pounds. well within my BMI standard, but of course with Asian guys being skinny (most of them), i am considered fat. i used to be a swimmer, the compete kind, for that matter, so i have broader shoulders than most asian girls. asian guys seem to think i am "butch" because i work out... :cry:
LOL it was more of a joking comment mind me but really I mean I love to sweat it out so If I dated someone who was a little chunky I'd get her to work out too since having a partner to work out with is a lot more fun. I'm actually 5'3 also and about 105lbs. Almost all of my nickname starts with little. The only two things that makes me feel alive is driving fast and doing something that will make me sweat buckets. My younger brother was 220lbs. a few years ago I got him on a routine and now he's on his own work out menu and dropped to about 170lbs. He's about 5'8 I believe. My best exercise machine is the Dance Dance Revolution machine. Love that game.
HongKongChick wrote: first of all, dont get all offended when i said "souped up". this term for me is when a car was only modified with a fart can, which makes ur car sound like ass, plus, it's all noise and no speed. a turn off for me. if u want the sound effect, get the whole thing done, sounds way better. or the car has those lights under the car, or big loud speakers, subs, or big shiny rims, all cosmetic, not real power

second, it's not stereotypical to like to drive fast. i like to drive fast myself

third, there is nothing wrong with having a honda civic, i used to have a 2000 honda civic si, got freaking stolen.... :( but it was alll stock!

forth. learning kickboxing, boxing, kendo... not typical. most asian guys dont even work out. hahaha

to me, u are not the stereotypical asian guy. now i dont know you know you, so i cant say if ur personality is stereotypical or not. but as far as i see, you have hobbies, that's way better alot of other guys out there.

and like i said before, i hate when those guys try to impress me with their expensive, mommy and daddy bought for me, cars... hate it. even in my car circle, we dont like them. there was a good looking, rich white boy who was in my class, who had a STi, all modded. and he liked me alot. but ya.... no thank you. yea, he is cute and rich, which if i were a typical asian girl, i would have jumped him. but it was a turn off for me.
No actually I wasn't offended because you said it in a sarcastic manner. I was just pointing out why I don't like it when all these kids talk about it using that phrase. I stress the honda civic part because we get stereotyped when "modded honda civic" comes to mind. Actually my second car I bought was a civic which got stolen too! So mad! I put so much blood and sweat into it. Had a ls/vtec motor, wheels, suspensions, paint etc. only to get it stolen because my idiot brother couldn't take care of it. So mad at him too! I got back to the civic recently only because I can't daily drive the mr2 no more. I love that car but I really loved to take my two cute nephews out driving and shopping and I can't driving anything that doesn't give me the thrill. Yes I love kids but...I don't think I'm ready to have my own yet. I only got into kendo and jujutsu because I was a really emo back in 7th grade. The type that hates the world and being pretty good at boxing makes me a menace. But after getting into buddhism it points toward kendo. I've only started on jujutsu so I can't say i know it yet...maybe a few moves.
HongKongChick wrote: for me, i couldnt care less what his family thinks. and my family is not that typical kind, they dont care if i date a poor lad or not. all they care about is that he is a good guy, loves me, and has drive. nothing is worst than a guy who doesn't know what he is doing, and does nothing to achieve his goal.
Yeah my parents are like that too. They are very understanding. They didn't even try to influence us into being Buddhist either. As they believe every body should walk their own path so I was a christian just until 8th grade where I converted to Buddhism after reading the book on Siddhartha. But my sister isn't having it good when it comes to marriage. She wasn't racist or anything but she generalized that Koreans or snobby people and she dislike them for that matter. Not to mention that stupid Korean kid that always pick on her and fight with her back in grade school. Somehow she met him again after so many years and now they've been dating for years and engaged. I actually don't like him either at first but he grew on me. I was just giving a hard time because he's dating my sister and as a brother I should at least do that much. The problem is that his parents want him to only marry Koreans. So they won't agree to the marriage or they will disown him. Of course he's going with marrying my sister. Where are you going to find a cute girl with a good career. Heck she makes more money than him and he lives in her apartment too. But Asians got some serious problems when it comes to dating and marriage.

HongKongChick
Posts: 226
Joined: Mar 17th, '10, 20:12
Location: Hong Kong

Post by HongKongChick » Mar 24th, '10, 19:29

PocketKiriyama wrote:
LOL it was more of a joking comment mind me but really I mean I love to sweat it out so If I dated someone who was a little chunky I'd get her to work out too since having a partner to work out with is a lot more fun. I'm actually 5'3 also and about 105lbs. Almost all of my nickname starts with little. The only two things that makes me feel alive is driving fast and doing something that will make me sweat buckets. My younger brother was 220lbs. a few years ago I got him on a routine and now he's on his own work out menu and dropped to about 170lbs. He's about 5'8 I believe. My best exercise machine is the Dance Dance Revolution machine. Love that game.
i dont like sweating that much, maybe that's why i like swimming! hahahaha but i do the machines just not running, it's bad for ur joints anyways! AHAHAH :)

DDR is instead a very good exercise game. now that the Wii came out, it's actually "fun" to work out. :D
PocketKiriyama wrote: No actually I wasn't offended because you said it in a sarcastic manner. I was just pointing out why I don't like it when all these kids talk about it using that phrase. I stress the honda civic part because we get stereotyped when "modded honda civic" comes to mind. Actually my second car I bought was a civic which got stolen too! So mad! I put so much blood and sweat into it. Had a ls/vtec motor, wheels, suspensions, paint etc. only to get it stolen because my idiot brother couldn't take care of it. So mad at him too! I got back to the civic recently only because I can't daily drive the mr2 no more. I love that car but I really loved to take my two cute nephews out driving and shopping and I can't driving anything that doesn't give me the thrill. Yes I love kids but...I don't think I'm ready to have my own yet. I only got into kendo and jujutsu because I was a really emo back in 7th grade. The type that hates the world and being pretty good at boxing makes me a menace. But after getting into buddhism it points toward kendo. I've only started on jujutsu so I can't say i know it yet...maybe a few moves.
haha.. u know what we call those kids that are so proud of their "souped up" hondas that look like xmas trees? POSERS. to me, cosmetics of the car dont matter, if u got no skills or no power, u are pretty sad. kinda like how i like my men. i mean yea u can be so pretty on the outside, if u are just empty, it's a total turn off.

yup Civics are good daily drivers. i have a Accord wagon now, when people get older, they do want a sedan instead. hahaha... :) but i still have my fun car though, my little Nissan 240, my project car. :cheers:
PocketKiriyama wrote: Yeah my parents are like that too. They are very understanding. They didn't even try to influence us into being Buddhist either. As they believe every body should walk their own path so I was a christian just until 8th grade where I converted to Buddhism after reading the book on Siddhartha. But my sister isn't having it good when it comes to marriage. She wasn't racist or anything but she generalized that Koreans or snobby people and she dislike them for that matter. Not to mention that stupid Korean kid that always pick on her and fight with her back in grade school. Somehow she met him again after so many years and now they've been dating for years and engaged. I actually don't like him either at first but he grew on me. I was just giving a hard time because he's dating my sister and as a brother I should at least do that much. The problem is that his parents want him to only marry Koreans. So they won't agree to the marriage or they will disown him. Of course he's going with marrying my sister. Where are you going to find a cute girl with a good career. Heck she makes more money than him and he lives in her apartment too. But Asians got some serious problems when it comes to dating and marriage.
wow, ur sis's boyfriend's parents are both korean? if so, so, they are pretty traditional. you can tell even by their dramas, if a woman is divorced with a kid, she is trash.... man, talk about close mindedness.

my parents dont really care which race i marry, though they do prefer chinese coz they can communicate better and may have similar traditions. but other than that. they are pretty open.

i love to cook, and i love to eat. so i would want my husband.boyfriend to be open minded with food. cant stand close mindedness. u can dislike certain food, but at least u can try first. that's the most problematic thing i find in white people. so if a guy who is always burgers and pizza, there is no way i will be with him long at all. so Asian guys do have one thing going for them, the similar taste in food! AHAHHA :lol

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