Marriage is a lifetime companionship between two people who are supposed to spend their lives together forever. However, in some cases, one of the spouses, in fact mostly husbands, has to move to another city or country due to their job nature or better career opportunities and they can’t always accommodate their families in that state due to financial issues.
Most people don’t encourage long-distance marriages as many such marriages fail or the wives have to suffer and struggle a lot alone. But it’s never impossible to sail your long-distance marriage boat. If both of the spouses put some more devotion and smart efforts, a long-distance marriage could be filled with infinite happiness.
Here are all the worthwhile tips that you need to know to save your long-distance marriage!
Adequate communication is a critical and essential aspect of long-distance relationships. However, excessive communication could prove to be really exhilarating for both partners!
Both of the spouses must have meaningful conversations at regular intervals to discuss family issues, finances, workload, and routine chores. It enables both of the partners to understand each other’s perspectives and struggles. Regular communication also ensures availability and emotional support to the spouses, thus strengthening their relationship. Without communication, one could neither convey the issues nor develop an understanding with the better half.
Avoid Unnecessary Bugging
While living apart, your partner would have a different work schedule, daily routine, and struggles than yours. Your unnecessary calls and bugging would exhaust your better half and would further create tension and conflicts between you both. You wouldn’t want your spouse to drift away from you, hence both of you must give space to each other, avoid excessive communication, and being clingy, possessive, or controlling towards each other.
Stalking and spamming would dim the spark of your marriage!
Spend time virtually together
Use technology to your advantage! With the advancement in technology, things have become quite smooth and easy. Your gadgets could play a vital role in eliminating the distances and cementing the connection with your spouse. Keep sending emails, sweet little lovely texts, voice notes, and greetings. Set your skype and FaceTime schedules. Research suggests that couples communicating face to face virtually, are more happy and certain than the ones who don’t.
Stay connected with each other on social media too, by writing appreciation posts, sharing pictures and videos, or commenting over each other’s posts. You could even watch movies together or play online games.
Define Boundaries and Limitations
Long-distance marriages become exhilarating when one of the partners tries to be a control freak. Sitting miles apart, one couldn’t understand each other’s exact scenario and expect things to go as per their plan. There should be space and boundaries between partners.
Don’t force conversations, suggestions, and interference; instead set some realistic and healthy expectations, that includes setting contact schedules, independency, and privacy limits. Also, try to know when to give and ask for support!
Keep sending Gifts and Parcels:
Mementos are strongly impactful! Exchanging belongings like a keychain, frames or any other thing connects you with your spouse emotionally, such things keep reminding the spouses of each other.
Distances doesn’t matter when you genuinely want to surprise your partner. Instead of mourning over loneliness on special occasions, surprise your partner by sending Gifts or arranging a dinner set up at their place, by taking the help of his/her friends and celebrate virtually together.
Frequently send parcels and care packages and let your partner know about your love and care.
Decide meeting and visit schedules:
No matter how calmly you and your partner are managing your long-distance marriage, there always comes a point when one of the partners gets super frustrated. Both of you must set end date as knowing the time of reunion eases the tension.
If a permanent reunion couldn’t happen in your case, then both of you should meet each other at regular intervals.
Don’t let your marriage stay at a blind distance though. Frequent longer visits might not suit your budget but you could plan short visits on a yearly basis according to your work schedule.
And it goes without saying – enjoy the time you are with your spouse as much as you can; emotionally and sexually. The satisfaction of sexual needs forms a vital part of a successful marriage, so make up for all lost time. Use sex toys if you have to like a glass dildo. In short, know no bounds when it comes to making the most of the time you spend with your spouse.
Enjoy your Me time and Be productive on weekends too!
Take the long-distance as an opportunity for your “Me time” and do all the things which your partner doesn’t enjoy or you want to do independently.
While your partner is away on work and handling finances, you shouldn’t sit idle, rather you must set some goals for yourself and contribute towards the family. This will keep you sane and make your partner value your role.
On weekends, you could pretend to be single to yourself and independently enjoy productive activities to help you sail your marriage boat!
Frequently Express Love and Eagerness:
Its love that keeps the heart ignited! Love flourishes with every expression and gesture. A long-distance marriage could work only if both the partners are aware of their mutual love and eagerness of having each other.
Keep telling your better half frequently that you love him/her and eager for his/her presence next to you every day and let their face brimming with smile.
Stay Positive and Loyal
The likelihood of conflicts is more in long-distance relationships and most often these conflicts remain unsolved. Despite the conflicts and disagreements, you must stay positive and loyal towards your spouse. You could always start all over again by forgiving and letting go of past events.
Practice mindfulness and yoga to stay calm and manage your anger and anxiety. This will also aid conflict resolution.
Physical unavailability or disagreements with your spouse doesn’t give you the right to cheat. There should be a firm commitment between both partners.
Trust your spouse and Ensure Assurance
With virtual communication, it’s more likely to assume disasters. But your trust must be firm on your partner and there should be no secrets. Instead of overthinking about worst outcomes, both should ensure assurance to each other by letting each other know their schedules, their socialization, workplace colleagues and friends, etc. They should keep updating each other about their parents and siblings to ensure support. Furthermore, the spouses must keep addressing their issues even blunders with a cool and open mind, simultaneously ensuring backup.
A marriage is a union of two souls for life and distance should never come in between. If the situation does arise where you have to live far away from your spouse, don’t let it get better of you and try your best to make it work – because there’s no way you can’t!